When I first started writing this, Venus had just entered Pisces, the rasi of its Exaltation after a long confusing 3 week Mercury retrograde, also in Pisces. The personality or archetype associated with Venusian energy is Shukracharya. This was a difficult retrograde for me and it feels as if Shukra comes in to assist me in processing the lessons learned during this time. In the stories, Shukracharya sacrificed and did great penance to Shiva and learned the secret of Sanjivani, the power to rejuvenate and bring one back from the dead, which he used to help the Asuras in the war against the Devas. If Shukracharya is a great Guru and benefic, why would he lead the Asuras (the dark ones)? And what is Sanjivani?

I have come to believe that sanjivani is the power and healing that comes through love and “other” as there is nothing more nourishing and rejuvenating than the way we blossom when we feel loved. Now science is beginning to validate this and evidence can be found in Sue Johnson’s work with couples and Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT). Love, bonding and connection are what has been found to heal Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Oxytocin is the antidote to the stress response and since oxytocin is the main player in bonding and Venus rules relationships, wouldn’t it make sense that Sanjivani would be connected with relationship and the innate feeling of being alive when we bond with others for healing? Paramahansa Yogananda said all healing occurs when the life force is stimulated, and what stimulates the life force more than love? I have observed in myself what happens when I feel loved; I look more youthful and I have a glow of health. I feel as if I can handle anything. But when I do not feel loved or supported and trapped in sadness or shame, I look older and tired. I understand that we are “supposed to” be able to get this love for ourselves through loving God. However, if everyone is divine and god is in everyone and everything, isn’t that essentially what we are doing?

I am primarily a therapist and my work deals with both the “internal within” and the “in between” people and I believe they are both equally valuable for spiritual growth. I am an astrologer second, and in astrology there are Gurus for both; Brihaspati/Jupiter and Shukracharya/Venus. Shukra is the Guru of the Asura and his realm is the powers of the world and the space “in between”; relationship. You can’t bring yourself back from the dead, someone else is needed as we see in the story were Shukra teaches the secret of Sanjivani to Brihaspati’s son who then uses it to bring back Shukra himself. Love and the innate human need to bond is extremely powerful and has the ability to rejuvenate and heal the life force. The growing body of research indicates that humans biggest defense against illness and suffering is RELATIONSHIP, which when “good” and nurturing, boosts both emotional and biological resilience and stimulates the life force, increasing healing and vitality. This happens powerfully in the space between. Brihaspati/Jupiter rules the “internal within”/the higher wisdom that most spiritual people want to jump to and so he is often elevated to a “higher” level and this path is appealing to those who struggle in relationships and in living in the world because this can be reached on your own. Venus/Shukra is the happiness in relationship and I refuse to value the personal individual spiritual work as “better” or more helpful than the work done between individuals in relationship. This bond between people is created not by transcending the relationship and yourself, it is created by being able to be present with another person and listen to how you impact them and then share how they impact you and work through it. Learning to work together in harmony and tending to the relationship as a gardner would her garden. Shukra shows us how to succeed in the world and how to rejuvante ourselves through our relationships. Sue Johnson’s work has begun to demonstrate this with science as she explains in this lecture https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ejp4OAk7Oo&t=4s. She talks about how humans actually feel less pain and can face great suffering when holding their loved one’s hand, and that this resilience translates to better overall health. So a person in a loving relationship is less likely to suffer illness and if they do then they are more likely to recover.

“Everything is a reflection of you” is something that is thrown around a lot within the spiritual community. And yes, this is true as far as understanding ourselves and our own psyches and reactions to others. It has been very helpful in my personal internal work when contemplating, healing and reflecting on my own inner chaos. But there is still the realm of “other” who is also as divine in their own right as you are, so to dismiss every aspect of god in every living thing around you to “everything is just a reflection of you” seems overly simplistic. If we are all reflections of the divine, doesn’t the divine want to learn about itself? It does this through another.

You may do all kinds of personal work on your own and learn to manage your projections and know what they mean, but you still exist in a body and have to interact with others and it’s certainly not doing you or your loved ones any good to just dismiss them when they are angry with your behavior and say “its all a projection of something inside you”. I would certainly become frustrated with this response. When someone betrays their partner and their world is turned upside down, yes they may eventually grow spiritually from the experience, but it is something that happened in the space “between people” and jumping to “everything is reflection of you” bypasses the work needed to heal the space between and dismisses the emotional death that takes place within the self and the external source of healing it will require. “Everything is a reflection of you” is simply not helpful in this situation. A safe, supportive environment with human bonding is where healing can take place.

The following article states that without a supportive external environment, all the internal resources you can muster won’t make much difference. The social work perspective is based on this and has shown evidence of it. An example is found in the article https://www.theglobeandmail.com/opinion/article-put-down-the-self-help-books-resilience-is-not-a-diy-endeavour/?fbclid=IwAR0_7VBWcdqrC0E-TojutjlDiPbMwHiLMXcSGkkdYm5qE49RPKEn_mvWd6I

On a personal note, about 10 years ago I moved away from all my relationships, as I found them too difficult to handle. I have been on a healing journey since then. I have done a lot of personal internal work and decided to move back and face them. I now have skills and spiritual practices which assist me and yes “everything is a projection of you” was very helpful to me for a while. But that token advice doesn’t help me navigate or understand how to get what I need in the space between. This space between is a mix of my projections and the other person’s and the relatioship that we create together which is also it’s own living “thing”. I believe relationship should also be viewed as a valuable vehicle towards spirituality when at the very least it compliments the internal work that is so prized within the spiritual community. It is love that allows us to calm fear and the stress response, which is the main generator of disease (see Gabor Mate’s work on stress and disease). Devotion is a path to God. I am currently in the midst of my Rahu maturation (Rahu in Libra, ruled by Venus) which is guiding me in this direction and this is where my personal and professional work will focus.

I heard Sahdguru talk about “detachment” and how this is a “wrong idea” that seeped into Vedic thought and that spiritually, we are not supposed to be detached, we are supposed to be completely involved in life but not be attached to the outcome of our efforts. He said Krishna was not detached, he was completely engaged and that complete involvement in life is spiritual if you truly give yourself to each situation and person you encounter. I believe the Jewish philospher/mystic Martin Buber wrote about this kind of presence in his book I and Thou. This is the route that resonates most deeply with me. Being completely present for the person in front of me and learning to navigate the space between us. I can’t say I am evolved enough to not be attached to any outcomes yet, but everything is a process. I enjoy working through problems on this level and it takes a very different skill set than just seeing everything as a projection of yourself. You have to listen to others and also be able to respond to them in a way that deepens connection and what you build together has a life of its own. The relationship is the “third thing”. First there is you, then there is other (where you see your reflection), but then the third is created – the relationship in the space between. This is where unconditional positive regard was born, the basis for Carl Rogers entire body of work on healing.

“He could find his soul in desire itself, but not in the objects of desire. If he possessed his desire,and his desire did not possess him, he would lay a hand on his soul, since his desire is the image and expression of his soul.” – Carl Jung. This is not detachment. This quote makes me think of rejuvantion and the stimuation of the life force/soul through what we love. As I finally finish writing this, Venus now sits in Taurus, and I feel even more strongly that Sanjivani is connected with love and bonding as lately I feel very loved and am able to observe the affects first hand. I see how it ripples out to those around me and the clients I serve. It is through this stimulation of the life force that healing and rejuvenation take place. Shame and Fear strangle the life force and there is no better or more powerful tool for healing than love and bonding and this is where we find the power to bring ourselves back from the dead.